Real-Life Effects of Comparing Yourself to Others We’re wired for connection and belonging, but if we constantly compare ourselves to others, we’re putting our happiness, confidence and mental health at risk. But when we dwell on the highlights of other people’s lives, it can quickly become toxic. Most of the time, this calculation is made in a split second in the background, and we don’t even realize it. Thomas Mussweiler, a professor of organizational behavior, describes comparison this way: "It's one of the most basic ways we develop an understanding of who we are, what we're good at, and what we're not so good at.” Our brain uses comparison to figure out how we measure up to other people. There’s actually a biological reason we’re prone to comparing ourselves to others. If we don’t stop comparing ourselves to others, we will constantly spend money and mental energy just trying to keep up! We need to break the comparison cycle because it’s a game we’ll never win. With 24/7 access to view the best parts of everyone else's lives right on my phone, I know exactly how I measure up against every other mom, wife and speaker with a social media account.Ĭomparisons steal our joy, our paychecks and our sanity. So, several years ago, I made a goal to stop comparing myself to others. And let me tell you: It hasn't been easy. If I’m not careful, I can wind up spending hours a week scrolling through the lives of these people I may or may not even know, and it leaves me feeling not so great about myself. I’m totally fascinated and intrigued by how these beautiful, successful people live their lives. It might even make you feel like you aren’t enough. Your body isn’t good enough, your wardrobe isn’t trendy enough, and your house isn’t Pottery-Barn enough. It’s really hard to be on social media and not compare yourself to others.
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